A KISS FROM MOM!

As a stayed with my parents this past week I ended up getting sick with the flu. I was feeling so bad on my last day there. After running around for a few hours we arrived back to their house. I new I had to lay down and rest before driving the hour back to my house. I gathered all my belongings so that I could just leave after I rested a bit. Seeing me gathering all my stuff, my mom started getting upset. She asked me if I was going and I told her yes after I rested a while though. She says, "Awe-don't go". I told her to come back and lay down with me so we could rest, thinking once she fell asleep I would just sneak out. Well, I must have been exhausted, because as we held hands laying in bed, I passed right out.

Once I awoke, she popped her head up and got out of bed. We went out on the sun porch and sat with my dad and she knew that I was feeling really bad. She kept touching my arm, my neck and my head with such concern on her face. She bent down and kissed my forehead a couple times. I had my legs up resting on a stool, and she continued on like this for about more 5 minutes with the continual touching, then all of a sudden she went down and kissed the top of my foot :-) I know some of you might be thinking yuck, but to me that was huge, it was my mom trying to care for me and not knowing how as she saw her little girl sick and in pain. I responded with tears in my eyes, "you are STILL my mommy, trying to make me feel better huh?" Her reply "yes". I know I am 46 years old, but the kiss, touch and love of my mom is so amazing and such a blessing to me.

My beautiful mom,
Oh, the joy in my heart as I experienced that sweet moment Jesus gave to me, having my mommy back. I will take those moments over any other right now in my life because I know all too soon, you will be taken from me. As dad and I got the news on 3/12 that the Dr gives you 6 months or so to be with us, it was so difficult. Even though I knew one day that day would come because of your terminal illness, it was still sad to hear. Especially having to go straight to my friends moms funeral a few hours later. It took an hour to get there, so on the drive I prayed that GOD would give me strength to make it through the service. I met Dan at the church and didn't even have a chance to tell him about the Dr's news regarding you. I know how much GOD loves me and I know and trust that he orchestrated every detail of that day. But let me tell you how hard it was for me, knowing that I would be walking that same journey as my friend Sunday, saying goodbye to MOM. Even though I have had quite a long time to prepare myself,,it is sooo hard. Dan asked me the next morning if there is just a little relief knowing that your suffering will be over? I told him yes, it kills me to see your anxiety level so high and it has to be exhausting for you. But the selfish side of me still wants you here. I love it when I tuck you in at night and I get to pray for you and you look up at me and say "thank you, that was so beautiful." I love that I get to hug and kiss you still. I love, love, love when dad puts music on and we dance together, (you still got the moves, mom.) Being able to care for you, even though it's difficult and draining at times, I am thankful that you are here with me still. So I am moving into the denial stage of it, just to cope for now. Once again I love you mom, you are the best in the world!
Loving you always,
your daughter,
Valarie